B-Z B-Z B-Z

Its been so busy for the last couple of weeks. I've slept less and less sometimes dreading I wont get any sleep at all. I have fallen behind on alot of editing and HW has taken the backseat. its a miracle I still get passing grades with the amount of effort I've been able to put in things like my marketing final project, or the Media Arts projects or even Biology! So dreading the finals that are the come in a few weeks and have yet to get started on Yoga's HW. Today I am meeting with Jessica and Anthony to work on our marketing project, we are doing pretty well, almost ready to present but I've got bigger fish to fry.. That final project for my photoshop class is really kicking my butt, Dr.Brown wants the theme of "three" to be represented in the piece but I have no idea what to do. So my last resort is to go out and take pictures of just anything and everything, in fact I am going to do that now.

Jesse's Birthday Oct 25, 2011

Jesse turned 19! We woke him up with balloons, a cake and noise makers at 12AM. It was glorious.

I love my little brother!

Midterms are Over! Love my Mini- Monarch!

Hip Hip Horray! Midterms are over! I really only had one exam, Biology Honors and I think I did fairly well despite not reading 2 of the 3 chapters. I knew the concepts from the lectures and study notes. So what's new? Lets see Caspian is talking a whole lot more now, he is pronouncing his RRRrrs very very well, I especially like to hear him say "Mi Amorrrr" which is what he calls his Abuelita because she doesn't like being called a grandma. He helps me cook his lunches and dinners now, and knows not to touch the stove and hot pans because they are "OT" and it will "URT" :D I love my peanut butters.

Got to talk to Kevin today on Skype, I'm one lucky girl my husband is one good looking dude. And so is my son, I'll have to sweep girls off my porch when he turns 12. I got a few pics done for my albums that I want to put together for Caspian. I also uploaded a few more pics from my SD cards so they are free for this weekend's shoots. 

 These pictures were taken back in March 2011 when we were first here to take an 8 week class. Caspian and I went to my old highschool Mater Dei to pick up a transcript. They were closed but I had my camera with me so I decided to take this opportunity to do a mini shoot of my baby in his future high school.

I love this candid of my baby, no idea what that stain is on his pants its been so long ago but his face is just priceless <3

Caspian is indeed a Mini-Monarch. Here he is climbing all over our Grotto to the Virgin Mary statue and also petting our school mascot the Mater Dei Monarch.

All in all it was a good day. Tomorrow is Friday so yay! I hope to get caught up on a few things this weekend. Crossing my fingers :)

Driving Wrecklessly

Last night I had a dream that I was driving a car. In my dream I was driving really fast even though I was on the freeway i was driving frightenly fast endangering my and the lives of the people that were with me. I saw what was a head of me but a part of me did not care. There was a big hill unlike in real life but in my dream it was part of the high way, rather it was like a mountain, and at the very top was only the road, two lanes and no barriers on the sides. I swirved and swayed because of my speed but I did not care. I remember being really determined to get somewhere or to get out of wherever I was FAST! It felt like a dull anxiety. Anyway at the top of this big mountain hill road I swerved uncontrollably trying to bypass another vehicle and before I knew it I lost control of the car. It wasn't until then that I realized that there were other people in the car that I was hurting, one of them my son and my mom. So the car fell off the road, tumbling down it turned over and hit a building off the side of the moutain, to myself I thought we're going to be fine just hold on and cover your heads.. When continued to roll down and I lost consciousness.
Then i woke up and the first thing I wanted to do is find out if my baby and my mom were ok. In my dream I was walking around with fresh bruises and open wounds on my face and body. I was home and found my brother Jesse who said Caspian was fine and he just had helped him make the bed. I kept asking to see him but he averted the question. I asked if my mom was ok but he did not answer. In the back of my mind I also knew Kevin had been in the accident but I didn't ask for him. Then I realized that something was wrong and I was dead.

Human Goodness?

Questioning today if it is even worth trying to help save this race.. I've recently been ambushed by the hightened awareness of Child Abuse, Human trafficking and pornography. Just dont know where the human goodness is? Is it in those who live in the second or third world countries and are ignorant to their own conditions, those who know not what they can do to make their lives better. Or is it in those who live in first world countries that carelessly live their lives without a care or consideration about what goes on outside their own immediate social circle. I am so upset for thinking this way but is it even worth it? Or am I just a quitter!

No. I refuse to quit. At least not for the children, they are the future and to get to them I must first get to the mothers. The woman is the pillar of the home, the foundation, the do-all and the law of the home. What can I do to make a difference??? Ugh is it so frustrating, I want to help but I must first help myself. I continue with my dream to be a doctor. Reconsidering whether a pediatritian is a better choice than an OB/GYN.. At this point I dont know but my thought remains, I must find the human goodness that is left, and that is in the innocense of children.

Insanity

Caspian was driving me insane today. He pooped in his diaper and THEN told me that he needed to go. He broke a the lightbulb from his Mickey Mouse nightlight that his uncle Cris bought him yesterday. Then cried because I wouldn't let him touch the broken glass as I was trying to sweep it off so he would not cut his feet.  When my mom served him lunch he picks up his plate and spills all his food on the floor, I had to feed it to the dogs. Then he decides that he wants to sit on my lap and wouldn't eat his newly served plate of food. He started to reach for something and spilled all of my drink all over the table and floor. I mopped it up and sat back down to eat and he kept pointing at my food so I offered him some and he wouldn't eat it. I tried taking a bite and he grabbed my thumb and held it down twice as he grunted for me not to take a bite. I was so fed up by then I told my mom to eat my food and I was leaving for school. I walk out with my Biology book and keys in hand and then remembered I needed my pencils and my blouse. He saw me walk back in the house and slams the door. Then when I tried to get out to leave again he stood by the door so I wouldn't get out without him. My mom had to come and get him. I kissed him and left as the tears just swelled out of his eyes. INSANITY!!!!

Grandpa's Handmade Gift Video

Caspian is an artist, and I finally got to upload the pictures from this event! Its my first video in iPhoto and I have a list of things I could have done better but its good for having done it in fifteen minutes before class started. <3 Hope you enjoy re-living this Grandpa! Caspian's Handmade Gift, mommy loves handmade gifts so we thought grandpa would too :D